My whole life I associated the word cancer with the question, “What’s your zodiac sign?” “I’m a Cancer!” I would proudly reply. Cancers are described as strong, in-tune with their emotions, and stubborn. I had no idea I would experience an intense emotional battle with cancer, putting my strength to the test. During my senior year of high school, after being diagnosed with stage II Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, I was absolutely devastated. I went from spending my days with friends, to spending my days with nurses and doctors. “Why is this happening to me!?” “I’m a Cancer with cancer, of course this would happen to me!” I realized that constantly moping about my circumstances was not going to help me get through this.

As a stubborn Cancer, against the judgment of my academic advisors, I pushed myself to study and do homework during my chemotherapy treatments and graduated high school with a 4.3 GPA. My stubbornness helped me accomplish my academic goals however, when I looked in the mirror and was unrecognizable, I soon realized that there are some things I could not overcome. I learned, with cancer, you must embrace change. Physically, I embraced every change that chemotherapy brought. I wore every surgery scar like a badge of honor and I never hid my hair-loss. Although I could accept the physical changes, the decline in my mental capacity felt like a burden I could not carry. My body was spending so much energy staying alive, I had no energy left to think. Coming to terms with taking a gap year to recover before starting college was difficult however, I knew it was for the best.

Although I resisted change in the past, becoming accustomed to it gave me the courage to pursue my passions. This big change for me came after my 1st year of college. I was attending UCSD for engineering but I was unhappy. Pre-cancer Janine would have accepted the path that I was on, but post-cancer Janine is not willing to waste her life on a career that does not make her happy. So, I made the leap to transfer to CSUF where I currently study Actuarial Science.

Unfortunately for me, once I transferred I would need to get a lot more used to change. There I was, a week before my first day at CSUF eager to finally be able to pursue what I love. Suddenly I noticed a familiar swelling in my neck. I felt a sinking pit in my stomach, but I told myself “I’m 4 years cancer free, there’s no way it’s back.” By the time the semester began, I was back in that white tube getting a PET scan. A sight I knew all too well. Still, I went to class trying to ignore the 13 cm mass in my chest. This time, I had non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. Talk about embracing change. I now had to pivot my life AGAIN. I found myself reverting to my old ways. I resisted change at every chance I got, trying to push myself through classes while fighting for my life between assignments. I even found myself lulling over the physical changes. I had no idea why cancer was more difficult for me to come to terms with the 2nd time around. So, I turned to the only person I knew who had gone through the cancer experience, myself.

I took the time to reflect on younger Janine’s experience. I was inspired by her courage and confidence. Looking up to my past self helped me embrace all of the changes that come with cancer. I would never be disappointed in my 17 year old self for taking a gap year, so I should not be disappointed in myself for needing one now. Even though I did not have a physical person going through this journey alongside me, turning to my past experience made me feel like I had someone to guide me. That’s when I decided that I want to help others going through similar struggles by using social media to share all of the emotional challenges that I faced throughout treatment, and post-treatment. I now have over 10 thousand people following my journey and I feel very fulfilled by the impact I have been able to have. As of January 2026, I can officially say, “I’m a Cancer that beat cancer TWICE!” Now, I am focusing on my studies and pursuing my dream of becoming an actuary. Whatever the future holds, I am no longer afraid of change and know I can overcome any surprises. Cancer changed me in this way for the better.